This morning a friend in full-time ministry posted that they found out they had lost a monthly financial supporter, and they have started the day with a pit in their stomach. Boy! Can I relate to that feeling.
Rick and I entered this life with ISCA both accepting that we may be asked to sacrifice our credit and our finances for this decision of obedience. We understood that was a possibility and chose to obey what we believed God was asking us to do. In the back of my mind, though, I think I really believed that if we obeyed, God would "bless" us the way I wanted to be blessed: Our house would sell quickly and for a good price, and He certainly wouldn't ask us to face foreclosure or bankruptcy. I mean, come on! We're doing something good here.
Please do not misunderstand me. Even though we are watching our savings dwindle away as we routinely go knock down cobwebs in our empty house, waiting for those calls from the Realtor that someone....anyone...wants to look at our property, we do not for one second regret our decision to move into ISCA house. It is not easy. There are stressful times. There are "issues" living with women from different cultures trying to coexist peacefully while studying for difficult classes. However, we do still fully believe that this is where God wants us to be, and we are very much at peace with the decision. BUT...
The MONEY!!!!
Sometimes I really hate money. Its such a source of stress, worry, anger, resentment....but mostly, FEAR. Which brings me to the second facebook post that turned my morning around.
In response to my friend's post about losing a supporter, another friend responded with a lovely encouragement including one very simple phrase: "Fear does not come from God."
Oh, AMEN SISTER!
This fear that money instills in me is absolutely, 100%, completely and totally NOT from my Father. He is the owner of the camels on a thousand hills. He created the universe and all that is in it. He has never, ever, ever, ever failed us in any way...financially, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally. He has always provided every single need.
No. This fear has another source, and I refuse to accept it anymore. I choose today to remember who my Father is, and to face the uncertainty of our financial future as it truly is...an opportunity to watch my God bless me in ways that I simply never could have imagined. I have faith, not fear, that He will surprise me with His goodness. I have hope, not fear, that His grace is sufficient.
Phil 4 (all of it) is pretty awesome stuff. But here's a little glimpse of where my heart and head are today:
4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Thoughts and Thanks
Last night I sat in a room full of mostly young men from around the world...Asia, Africa, Texas...and we discussed the events and happenings in 2012 for which we are thankful. I know this is a very common practice this time of year, but its the first time I've ever participated in this ritual with international friends.
One thing we all have in common is we are all thankful for our families. I was teased for the sappy expression I put on every time someone said the word "family", but I just couldn't help it. There are just so many times when I am overwhelmed by what a gift a loving family can be.
Today, before I launch into the frantic food frenzy that is the day before Thanksgiving, I want to take a moment to share how grateful I am for my only little clan.
I am, of course, so thankful for my husband. He works hard every day and is as loyal as the day is long. He listens to my rants, tries his best to understand my views, and wipes my tears when I realize I am a total misfit. He makes me laugh more than any other human being, he loves Jesus with all his heart, and is the most kind, generous, and understanding father I've ever encountered.
I am also quite grateful for my oldest son. He has given me a run for my money at every turn, and knows how to push every single one of my buttons at the same time, but he's never written me off, even though there are many many children who just walk away from their families. He has taught me what it looks like to forgive , and through him I've been given the opportunity to learn how to access Christ's love within me. He is a sharpening stone in my life, and I so enjoy watching God work in and through him.
My oldest daughter also fills my heart with appreciation and admiration. She is genuine and open, but is learning the fine art of recognizing trustworthy friends. She is willing to do the extremely hard work of forgiving past mistakes; her own and those of others. Her laugh fills a room but she doesn't have to joke to lift a mood. She is a true friend who listens with an open mind and prays with an open heart.
I am grateful for my younger son as well. He is so much like his father, loyal and diligent. I don't get to see him very often these days, but he is in love with an only-child. While it is difficult to part with him, his kindness in spending time with her family melts my heart. He is young, but he is becoming a man who recognizes a need and does his best to fill it. He is quiet and thoughtful and has a good heart.
This brings me to my youngest daughter, so much a mix of my husband and myself. She has such a sensitive spirit, and she constantly reminds me that its okay to feel every emotion fully. She is learning her worth and value as defined by Christ and I am often amazed at her strength when faced with temptation. In the midst of so many stressors during her senior high school year, she allows herself the balance of unapologetic joy, anger and tears...all bathed in Scripture.
God knew that I needed each of these people to mold me, sharpen me and direct me to Him. I am so thankful for each person in my family and for every memory that has formed us into who we are.
I'm not typically a big fan of country music, but when it comes to sappy lyrics about loving your family and your life, well...country music has a lot to offer.
Happy Thanksgiving!
One thing we all have in common is we are all thankful for our families. I was teased for the sappy expression I put on every time someone said the word "family", but I just couldn't help it. There are just so many times when I am overwhelmed by what a gift a loving family can be.
Today, before I launch into the frantic food frenzy that is the day before Thanksgiving, I want to take a moment to share how grateful I am for my only little clan.
I am, of course, so thankful for my husband. He works hard every day and is as loyal as the day is long. He listens to my rants, tries his best to understand my views, and wipes my tears when I realize I am a total misfit. He makes me laugh more than any other human being, he loves Jesus with all his heart, and is the most kind, generous, and understanding father I've ever encountered.
I am also quite grateful for my oldest son. He has given me a run for my money at every turn, and knows how to push every single one of my buttons at the same time, but he's never written me off, even though there are many many children who just walk away from their families. He has taught me what it looks like to forgive , and through him I've been given the opportunity to learn how to access Christ's love within me. He is a sharpening stone in my life, and I so enjoy watching God work in and through him.
My oldest daughter also fills my heart with appreciation and admiration. She is genuine and open, but is learning the fine art of recognizing trustworthy friends. She is willing to do the extremely hard work of forgiving past mistakes; her own and those of others. Her laugh fills a room but she doesn't have to joke to lift a mood. She is a true friend who listens with an open mind and prays with an open heart.
I am grateful for my younger son as well. He is so much like his father, loyal and diligent. I don't get to see him very often these days, but he is in love with an only-child. While it is difficult to part with him, his kindness in spending time with her family melts my heart. He is young, but he is becoming a man who recognizes a need and does his best to fill it. He is quiet and thoughtful and has a good heart.
This brings me to my youngest daughter, so much a mix of my husband and myself. She has such a sensitive spirit, and she constantly reminds me that its okay to feel every emotion fully. She is learning her worth and value as defined by Christ and I am often amazed at her strength when faced with temptation. In the midst of so many stressors during her senior high school year, she allows herself the balance of unapologetic joy, anger and tears...all bathed in Scripture.
God knew that I needed each of these people to mold me, sharpen me and direct me to Him. I am so thankful for each person in my family and for every memory that has formed us into who we are.
I'm not typically a big fan of country music, but when it comes to sappy lyrics about loving your family and your life, well...country music has a lot to offer.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
The Ultimate Culture Shock
Living in a home with people from multiple cultures can have its ups and downs. I admit, I am learning a lot,which is good since I know so little about this process.
I've been trying to do some research and have been asking questions of people who know more about cultural transitions than I do. I've been thinking about my friends who move to other parts of the world, and have been realizing how difficult that must be for them. I've also become aware of how much more I could have done to reach out to them when they've made these life-changes.
During all of this research and questioning, remembering and regretting, I had a thought: Jesus must have experienced the ultimate culture shock. I mean...I think leaving Asia and coming to the U.S. must be very difficult, but it can't be anything like leaving Heaven and coming to Earth.
I've decided to focus for a while on how He handled the cultural transition, and how He served His Father in the midst of it.
He surrounded Himself with a few close friends
He never lost sight of why He was here
He talked to His Father constantly
He LOVED people
He relied on God's power...
Yes. I'll focus on Him and try to see everyone the way Christ does. Seems like a good plan.
I've been trying to do some research and have been asking questions of people who know more about cultural transitions than I do. I've been thinking about my friends who move to other parts of the world, and have been realizing how difficult that must be for them. I've also become aware of how much more I could have done to reach out to them when they've made these life-changes.
During all of this research and questioning, remembering and regretting, I had a thought: Jesus must have experienced the ultimate culture shock. I mean...I think leaving Asia and coming to the U.S. must be very difficult, but it can't be anything like leaving Heaven and coming to Earth.
I've decided to focus for a while on how He handled the cultural transition, and how He served His Father in the midst of it.
He surrounded Himself with a few close friends
He never lost sight of why He was here
He talked to His Father constantly
He LOVED people
He relied on God's power...
Yes. I'll focus on Him and try to see everyone the way Christ does. Seems like a good plan.
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