My Church Can Make a Grown Man Cry....

Yesterday started out with me being grumpy again.  I like to think of myself as this positive person, but the truth is (and I think my husband would verify this), I can be pretty witchy at times.  In all honesty, I can be downright negative and complain....a lot.  I don't like this about myself, though, and am becoming more sensitive to hearing the Holy Spirit when it says, "Let it go."

Yesterday was one of those times.  The morning felt out of my control.  I wasn't involved in the worship planning, and the rest of the planning team scheduled a meeting and didn't include me.  The teaching elder for the day had to rush down to be with his father who has been battling cancer, leaving us with no one to preach the message.  We had to punt...and fast.  But they didn't invite me.

At first I was hurt and angry.  Then, I heard that voice, "Let it go."  I've been griping that I don't get to worship on Sundays since I'm always working.  So yesterday I said, "Well, doggon it, I'm just gonna let them do their thing and I'm going to worship with the best of 'em!"  And I did.  In fact, a teenager who was sitting halfway across the room came over to me after the service and said, "Ms. Monica, your singing was really good."  Okay....so maybe I need to turn down the volume on my worship level just a bit.

And as for having to "punt,"  Wow!  What a morning.  We sang a lot and prayed a lot.  I saw a grown man cry as he shared with us about how God showed them how He used them in a little girls' life spanning 15 years.  I listened to a man choke back tears as he shared his fears about his wife expecting a baby...and his wife's heart condition that makes it high risk.  I choked back the tears as a mom shared her hopes and fears about her adopted son with behavioral issues.  That one took me back 17 years...She could have been me back in 1995.

Later that evening at our small group, I listened to my own husband shed his own tears as he recounted that time in our lives when we were praying about our own son, and now he is back from a mission trip and on fire for Jesus.

I just cannot even fathom the depths of God's goodness and love and power and grace and mercy and sovereignty.